by Harold and Bette Gillogly Before we leave the subject of Inside vs. Outside Thinkers, we need to offer one more piece of advice. You may be wondering why we have spent so much time on this one subject. Here’s why: through our many years of teaching and counseling couples, we have discovered that most […]
Archive | Relationship Skills
…So Take Some Friendly Advice
Communication Relationship SkillsIf you read last week’s blog, (and we certainly hope you did!) then you have figured out whether you are an Inside Thinker or an Outside Thinker. Both ways of processing information carry strengths as well as some inherent problems. If you are an Outside Thinker, your spouse, family and friends may sometimes think you […]
Not All Silence Is a weapon
Communication Relationship Skillsby Harold & Bette Gillogly Since we tried last week to rattle the cages of those who use silence as a weapon, though they might not even realize it. It’s only fair that this week we explain how not all silence is a weapon. Some silence is because your spouse simply needs time to think […]
Celebrate Your Coupleness!
Joy & Happiness Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly Summer is a terrific time to celebrate being a couple! Life can get so intense, can’t it? Maybe your life is full of a lot of “gotta’s.” We’ve gotta earn a living. We’ve gotta take the kids to soccer. We’ve gotta mow the lawn. Perhaps your life is so full of “gotta’s” that you have pushed […]
Is Integrity Worth the Cost?
Persevering Love Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly Can you imagine a tongue screw becoming a symbol of integrity? It became so in the city of Antwerp, Holland in the year 1577. Hans Bret, a young bakery worker, lived in Antwerp with his widowed mother during a time of perilous Protestant persecution in Europe. Hans was an eager […]
Handling Anger in Conflict
Anger Issues Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly It seems like we’ve been talking about fighting an awfully long time, doesn’t it? But there is a reason for it. For far too many Christian couples, Holy Wedlock has become Holy Deadlock. From our experience, we have to agree with counselors who declare that conflict is the greatest cause […]
Encouraged – Encourager
Relationship Skills Tough TimesHave you needed encouragement in the last few months? Most of us would say “YES.” Did anyone come alongside and speak a word of encouragement to you or do something for you that “picked you up”? Hopefully, you can say “YES” to that question as well. If you said “Yes” to both questions, did you […]
Becoming Refreshers
Relationship Skills“Uh-oh, look who’s coming. Whatever you do, don’t make eye contact. Quick — say something to me about this flower arrangement.” “Flower arrangement? Oh…uh… What a great flower arrangement! Those florists sure did a bang-up job on it this week. Don’t you think?” “Yes, indeed. Why, just look at those colors, the way they’re blended […]
Well What Did You Expect (Pt. 2 of 2)
Persevering Love Relationship Skills Thinking Pitfallsby Harold & Bette Gillogly Remember in our last Seeds for Growth, we found out there were two roads leading to two entirely different places. The first road is paved with “ought to be’s” – my wife ought to be…. My husband ought to be…. My children ought to be…. This road leads to a […]
Overcoming Defensiveness Pt. 2
Relationship Skills Thinking Pitfallsby Harold and Bette Gillogly In a previous Seeds For Growth, we began discussing defensiveness — our instinctive reaction of self-protection. We seem to go through life feeling we must protect ourselves at any cost. When our mate says something that pushes one of our hot buttons, we lash out in retaliation. Defensiveness is a […]