By Harold and Bette Gillogly Feelings of forgiveness do not happen in a vacuum. We don’t wake up one morning and say, “I’m not going to feel resentment toward that person who hurt me anymore.” Shazam! Nope. Doesn’t happen that way. Our emotions change as we change our behavior. We can’t simply say. We have […]
Archive | Relationship Skills
God Says, “Forgive Like Me”
Anger Issues Relationship SkillsBy Harold and Bette Gillogly We talked about the first kind of forgiveness in our last two blogs: “to cancel a debt, to pardon.” Today we’re going to explore the second kind, and we want to warn you, this one is harder than the first. The second kind of forgiveness means “to relinquish resentment against […]
Forgiveness and Consequences
Anger Issues Relationship SkillsBy Harold and Bette Gillogly Forgiving someone – that is canceling their debt and pardoning their guilt – doesn’t always mean we can save them from the consequences of their offences. Here’s an example of what we’re talking about: One afternoon, our high school daughter came to us crying. She had skipped school that day […]
What Does Forgiveness Mean?
Anger Issues Relationship SkillsBy Harold and Bette Gillogly There are two different kinds of forgiveness. Wow! Who knew? First, it means “to cancel a debt, to pardon or remit guilt.” That’s probably what you always thought it meant. Right? The second kind of forgiveness is “to relinquish resentment against the debtor.” This second meaning is harder to understand, […]
Last Two Secret Ingredients for Lasting Love
Marital Intimacy Relationship SkillsBy Harold and Bette Gillogly Here we go, the final two ingredients to make your love last forever. Do you remember the first six? They are posted on our website www.marriages.net. Simply click on “Articles” and select from “Recent Posts” in the right hand border. But you are breathlessly waiting to hear the last 2, […]
8 Ingredients that Make Love Last Forever
Commitment Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly Sugar and salt look a lot alike, don’t they? But what happens if you substitute a cup of salt to your cake recipe in place of sugar? Your cake is a flop! Not even the dog will eat it! Here’s the simple truth. Life is like cake. You put the […]
One Last Piece of Advice for All You Thinkers
Communication Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly Before we leave the subject of Inside vs. Outside Thinkers, we need to offer one more piece of advice. You may be wondering why we have spent so much time on this one subject. Here’s why: through our many years of teaching and counseling couples, we have discovered that most […]
…So Take Some Friendly Advice
Communication Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly If you read last week’s blog, (and we certainly hope you did!) then you have figured out whether you are an Inside Thinker or an Outside Thinker. Both ways of processing information carry strengths as well as some inherent problems. If you are an Outside Thinker, your spouse, family and […]
Not All Silence Is a weapon
Communication Relationship Skillsby Harold & Bette Gillogly Since we tried last week to rattle the cages of those who use silence as a weapon, though they might not even realize it. It’s only fair that this week we explain how not all silence is a weapon. Some silence is because your spouse simply needs time to think […]
Celebrate Your Coupleness!
Joy & Happiness Relationship Skillsby Harold and Bette Gillogly Summer is a terrific time to celebrate being a couple! Life can get so intense, can’t it? Maybe your life is full of a lot of “gotta’s.” We’ve gotta earn a living. We’ve gotta take the kids to soccer. We’ve gotta mow the lawn. Perhaps your life is so full of “gotta’s” that you have pushed […]