by Harold and Bette Gillogly Assumptions will kill your relationships! Assumptions like, “She just said that to hurt me.” “He did that because he doesn’t care what I think.” “We can’t talk about it because she (he) will just get mad and we’ll end up in a fight. So why bother?” It’s not just that […]
Anger Issues
By Harold and Bette Gillogly I was on the phone making an appointment for a medical test I needed. Harold was sitting close enough to hear the conversation. Monday morning, three weeks away, was the earliest appointment available, so I took it. Harold said softly, “It has to be Monday?” I assumed he meant […]
Communication
by Harold and Bette Gillogly We’ve talked about the first four ingredients you have to choose to practice in your marriage IF you want it to last. (Ingredients in. Results out.) See those articles in the “Recent Posts” in the right margin. Here are ingredients five and six: Talking Together Choice: So you sat your […]
Communication
by Harold and Bette Gillogly Before we leave the subject of Inside vs. Outside Thinkers, we need to offer one more piece of advice. You may be wondering why we have spent so much time on this one subject. Here’s why: through our many years of teaching and counseling couples, we have discovered that most […]
Communication
by Harold and Bette Gillogly If you read last week’s blog, (and we certainly hope you did!) then you have figured out whether you are an Inside Thinker or an Outside Thinker. Both ways of processing information carry strengths as well as some inherent problems. If you are an Outside Thinker, your spouse, family and […]
Communication
by Harold & Bette Gillogly Since we tried last week to rattle the cages of those who use silence as a weapon, though they might not even realize it. It’s only fair that this week we explain how not all silence is a weapon. Some silence is because your spouse simply needs time to think […]
Anger Issues
by Harold and Bette Gillogly Whether you are the Silence-er or the Silence-ee, when silence is used as a weapon, everybody gets hurt! Norm Wright once said that more marriages today are dying from silence than from violence. He’s right. Silence can be very flammable and feeds the fires of conflict. Do you use silence […]
Commitment
Believe your marriage will thrive, and it will. By Sheila Weber Do you remember how you felt when you first met “the one”? It was likely an exciting time as you prepared to embark on a lifetime of love with your soulmate. All too often, however, that love that feels so all-consuming in the early […]
Communication
It’s Time for the Church to Step up to the Plate By Harold & Bette Gillogly Several years ago, HomeLife Magazine published our survey questionnaire on what makes a healthy marriage. Here are the results they published: 33% of the over 2300 respondents stated the primary source for their sex education was “friends and the locker […]
Communication
What is your definition of love? What actions do you interpret as love? We all have a “language of love” we have been compiling since early childhood. The ways your parents communicated their love to you….The ways you saw other people communicate love to one another….Even television and movies helped form your “language of love.” […]